Creatures of habit

We really are creatures of habit! It's so frustrating to know what's best and then continue to do the opposite - right now my battle is with building better habits for food, and health, and getting rid of the bad ones. Sugar is my weakness! I was a candy junkie for so long, and still there is emotion attached to a junk binge when I'm feeling low. Of course I know that the sugar just makes me feel worse - why do I eat it? Erg.

It's hard because I am in the in-between time between school and job. Once I get settled in my "New Life" so to say, things will be better. For some reason I eat such awful food when I am home. The habit has been instilled: sit, eat, veg.

Going through some old things yesterday, I found some of my old journals from high school. I was tempted to destroy all evidence and burn them from sight, haha! But instead I put them back in the shoebox, under the bed.

Reading my journal from grade 12 was an eye-opener - back from when I first got sick. Mad tests, feeling awful, constant pain, not knowing what was wrong or how I could feel better. That first year ill was a year without dancing. I swore I would never forget how it felt, but really the body is so incredible, right now I can imagine that all those experiences were just a dream! It's important to think about it though. And that past should be the motivation for getting better, building positive habits. I wonder how my experience would have been if I would have taken a better approach to health back then?

But then again, telling a depressed 17 year old that green vegetables really can change her life might not have had much of an impact! Better late than never I would suppose. :)